Day Four~ The meltdowns continue....this time they are Breanne's.

Day Four ends our time at Disney World. When I was told by Danny how big it actually was, I heard him, but I just didn't HEAR him. I can't begin to tell you the size of this place. I was also told that there is no way you can see it all in 5-7 days, much less 4. Now I know why. Danny kept track our our steps and we averaged around 12-15 thousand a day. A day! I swear I wanted to rip that watch off his arm at one point in time.

We began our day by sleeping in. Yessss. Then we packed and hit the road looking for souvenir shops for requests  friends had made. This took awhile Because everyone knows, no man wants to go souvenir shopping. Ever. 

Now, when we left FOR this trip, I drove. I have a hard time being a passenger in the back seat of any vehicle. I get antsy. And twitchy. And want to crawl out of my skin by the first hour. And grouchy. (See the first three reasons.)

 So, when I drive, I am totally comfortable and there is no reason for meds. Reason enough for me.

 Put one more man in the mix on the way home and you have two males that:

A. want to drive

B. Want to sit up front because the back seat is too crowded ( duh)

Neither of these equations was working for me. So I quietly took my husband aside and told him that if He didn't drive or I didn't drive, I would go apesh*t crazy. Now, one would think that would get the message across, right? Wrong.

"Why don't you drive Danny and we'll  take turns?"

NOOOOOOOOO! Was no one listening to me?  I anticipated going insane. And then was forced to take some meds. 

When we drove down, Breanne and I noticed some great produce farms/stands and an awesome plantation that sold antiques and fruit and veggies and I'll bet every wonderful thing under the sun! "We will stop THERE on the way home" we said.

Yeah, no. My husband had the bright idea of cutting off time on the trip home by rerouting us another way home. What? You want to do What? You want to get home at 10 pm versus 11 pm, why? What on earth could possibly make a difference on one hour?  And this is the reason traveling without men is so much easier.

Picture Breanne and I pouting in the back seat. Now picture Breanne and I and Zailey squished like sardines in the back seat. Welcome to my life for the next 7 hours. 

On our way, we notice a 7-11. Hallelujah!  Georgia  and Alabama have no 7-11's anywhere. Breanne is craving a coke slurpee. We stop. The coke slurpee machine is not working. Oh man, this trip already smells like doom.

We see one more 7-11 down the road. Do we stop? Nooooooooo. ( "we didn't think you were serious about wanting a coke slurpee!") Remember, this is a pregnant woman who cannot keep anything down and has lost 13 pounds. Humor her and give her a damn slurpee!

We see TWO more 7-11's. STOP already! Did they? NO!

I quote: " Wouldn't it be funny is these were the last two 7-11's we see on the way home?" I'll give you a hint~ they were.

So now we have a disgruntled pregnant woman, a 55 year old twitching woman  and a small child in the backseat. Good times.

Cue the rain. Yep. You knew it was coming. We saw a fruit stand that had Indian River fruit; a hybrid orange that is supposed to be super sweet, Let's stop!!! So we did and  we were disappointed in what they had to offer. Not that alligators heads are bad or anything....just not on my "want" list today. Or any day.

Back in the car. More sulking.

We had more torrential downpour for the rest of the journey home. When we got to the border of Florida and Georgia, to my right I saw....can it be......the plantation we wanted to go to?!!! Yes!!! it was!

Yes! 

We drove by.

 That does it. No more men on any more road trips. Period. We. Are. Done.

Like this vacation.

Day Three....Disney's Hollywood Studios

Day three....Hollywood Studios, Orlando.

Have you ever anticipated something so badly that you could barely sleep the night before? Yeah. That was not me. When they woke me up to get ready for day three....I wanted someone to give me some blue juice. Put me down.
 I don't wanna wallllllk anymorrrrre!
Don't make me goooooo!
 Oh fine.....So we get to Hollywood studios with a kajillion other people when it opened. That's right, pretty sure I counted every one of them. So we decide to go left when everyone else is going right...less crowded streets that way. The theme is a backlot studio....prop streets with prop houses. Only, this park did not thrill me in the design. Seemed a little, uhm, lacking. ( there's always a critic somewhere)
We get to the first thing we wanted to do, only to find it wasn't open yet. Whaaaat? is THAT all about?
Studio Backlot tour....a demo of how they make the movies like Raiders of the Lost Ark, etc etc. So we move on. To wander the streets aimlessly
 Do we have a map? Well, yes of course we do.
 Can we find what we want? Of course not!
Finally~ We get to "honey I shrunk the kids set adventure", thinking we were going to have an adventure!!! No. Just a big playground that makes you feel like an ant. With screaming running children. Moving right along.
Cue the rain. AGAIN.  We bypass the Muppets...they don't really thrill us.  The rain comes down harder. We find refuge in an Italian Restaurant. Sweet. The wait if 45 minutes if you don't have a reservation. We don't. After much deliberation....we decide to sit it out and wait. (Transalation: Colleen is not going out there to wander aimlessly to find another eatery to discover we have to wait there, as well. Nu uh. No way. We wait here.) The rain becomes a monsoon complete with thunder and lightening. We eat, and then reluctantly head out into it. Complete with ponchos. The rain comes down harder. Now, let me explain something here. It's not like when it rains in Washington and the temperature goes down a little. Nope. It stays at a lovely 93 degrees and when you have that hood over your head, the clear poncho steams up and makes things even more enjoyable. If you love a sauna.
So picture thousands of people in their ponchos, looking for a ride that isn't closed . They close all the outdoor rides in inclement weather. Wussies.
Now picture you bumping into said people over and over again, while trying to navigate a park in the pouring down rain. You getting the picture?
We find Beauty and the beast and duck in. Yesss. Out of the rain and into the enclosure equipped with bleachers. For my broken tailbone. ( I broke it years ago but the ramifications are still with me.....why wouldn't they be?) So I sit in misery trying to look happy. I don't think I was fooling anyone.
It's over and we are trying to figure out which rides we can go on .......the one we wanted to do reeeeeeal bad was Toy Story. So we walk a thousand miles to that attraction. To find the wait is 2 hours and 30 minutes. And the fast pass is closed. Of course it is. Well crud, scratch that. We wander around, trying to find cast  members to trade our pins with.....( the one thing we enjoyed doing!) and wait out the weather. By the time it stopped, we decided we had enough. Time to call it a day. Please.
I really can't even tell you what time we got back or what we did for dinner because I think I blacked it all out!
I KNEW we should have gone to Epcot.
Stay tuned for day four......( hint....men backseat driving, only in the front seat)

Day Two....the meltdown continues....

Day two of Disneyworld!

You know, the park so dang HUGE you can take a ferry from the parking lot to get to Magic Kingdom! No kidding!! This is it ~

We decided that we would spend 9 am until around 2:30 at Magic Kingdom and go back to the resort to swim and rest. Then we would head back for the fireworks and electrical light parade. Sound like a good plan? yeah, we thought so too. So off we went. To walk another 10 thousand miles. Actually, Danny had a watch that counted his steps and it said we clocked in around 12 thousand steps. Which, in actuality, means 15 thousand for me and my small stubby legs. My feet were going to fall off. No lie. So we went on the Jungle cruise, the Pirates of the Caribbean, Zay met some of the fairies, and then topped it off with Splash Mountain. All in 90 degree , 90 percent humidity weather. Oh, the joy. Did I mention the children meltdowns?

 Because we were privy to more of those as well. I waited with Breanne while Mike, Danny and Zay went on Splash mountain. She was trying to get a good spot to catch them on camera as they came down the waterfall and I was trying to find a spot to discreetly die. I had Danny's military backpack with me and set it down beside me. Which, apparently, was a direct call to two children to come and hop over it over and over again. At the 4th hop, I very quietly said to the boy ~ " if you come anywhere near this again, I will push you down". I did. Do not doubt a very tired, hurting 55 year old woman. The look of horror on his face was my reward.

We get back to the hotel ( after we walk a thousand miles to get OUT of the park, to get ON the ferry, to get OFF the ferry , to walk back to our car in the parking lot, to drive back to the resort, which is next door, but took us almost 30 minutes to get there) and it starts to pour down rain. I mean POUR. Which left us no choice but to nap. So be it.

We wake up and head into Orlando to go to the Cheesecake Factory. Why, you ask? Because Breanne has not been to one in almost 3 years and is dying for some lettuce wraps and grilled artichoke. Ok, so am I. Those things are delicious. Annnnd one tends to cater to a pregnant woman who cannot keep any food down whatsoever. Poor girl.

After that delicious meal, I decide we should head back to Magic Kingdom for the fireworks. People are lining the streets getting themselves a choice spot for the light parade. I have to tell you, those fireworks were amazing. I have never seen a better show. Seriously. Have. Not.

 And then cue the rain. Yep. More rain. We try to wait it out by shopping in the gift stores, which my mind totally appreciates the layouts and graphics and colors and displays and.....well, you get the point. Then we hear the announcement. The parade has been cancelled.  Dang it!! This rain is getting on my last nerve! We walk back to the car , covered in ponchos. I looked like a drowned rat...second day in a row. Praying I wouldn't see anyone point at me and say " didn't we see that awful looking woman yesterday at Animal Kingdom mom?" 

And day three will not disappoint you either.

Not the Happiest Place on Earth....

Welcome to Disney World! Where you can fit three cities into~ or more. I have never been , so I was excited and a little apprehensive to go. For those of you who know me well, my fibromyalgia worried me. How was I going to be able to keep up with/not drag down anyone? The place is so huge I was very worried about this.
It took me 7 hours to drive there from Breanne's home and it was pretty cool to drive into, I have to admit. And I was told it was huge, I just had no idea. You can look at a pamphlet map all you want, it's never going to give you an accurate picture. We picked up Michael at the Orlando airport that evening and our vacation officially began!

Our first day at Animal Kingdom: Our hotel bus took us there and told us where they would be on the hour, for our return back. Great. Onward. To the masses of people in 90 something degree temperature, felt like 100 percent humidity. Oh no. I was exhausted before we even got into the gate. We were able to catch an indoor show of "it's a bugs life" and that was enjoyable. But back out to the heat. Breanne was not able to go on a majority of rides due to jarring and bumping and liabilities so I kept her company. Meaning I  used that time to re-coup from the thousands of miles we walked to get to that ride. Yes, I said thousands. It felt like it. Roll in the horrible rainy, hot, thunder and lightening weather. Rides shut down. People get soaked and run into the shops to buy ponchos. Not me. By this time, I look like  a drowned rat and I figured, eh.....no one's going to see me again...what the h*ll. The thing is...you walk forever to get to your ride, then wait forever to ride your ride. And in the meantime, you witness the most spectacular melt downs you have ever seen! I am talking SCREAMING children (not just crying, but directed AT the parents) full fledged  out and out flailing of limbs and eyes closed meltdown~ Wow. Not a pretty sight. And I am talking about the parents taking this. What the heck? Every meltdown I saw...the parents did absolutely nothing. At. All.  THAT should have been a show there......
At the end of our day, we headed back to where the bus said it would be. No bus. For about 35 minutes. Still no bus. So I called the resort. And the lady told me we had to take the monorail back. Uhm, there is no monorail there, so....... She also told me it was not possible that the bus took us straight there and dropped us off. Okaaaaay. In the meantime, Michael made friends with a group of Argentinian cheerleaders. They wanted volunteers to cheer with them and, yeah, my husband went willingly. Why was I not surprised? By this time, I am totally soaked to the bone, weary and just wanted to lie down. And not on a bus bench. Waiting for a bus that never came. Cue the Taxi cab. Back to the resort to recoup. Stay tuned as we begin another day at the most magical place on earth tomorrow.