Tuesday, July 12, 2011

Spiders, Cicadas, Palmettos, oh my

Gather 'round boys and girls,
today we're going to talk about bugs!
Who can tell me if you've even been bitten by one?
Yes? How about an invisible one?
That's right! Apparently, here in the south, they have invisible bugs as well as the ones you can see!
Oh joy! It's not enough that I don't even like to step on the "grass" here because every time I do, I see a large bug. Every time.
Large spiders, large cicadas, large palmettos.
What, you say? What is a palmetto? Allow me to quote my new friend( on my first trip to Alabama) sitting next to me on the plane.
"You're gonna see cockroaches. People down here call em Palmettos. Just a fancy word for cockroach. You know, like "la cucaracha" in the song? Same difference. Same bug. Just a fancyfide name for em".
Wonderful.
My last experience with cockroaches was not pleasant. But that's another story.
Apollo has to be on leash when he goes out because there is no fenced in yard. So we take him potty on a leash. That means we have to walk on the grass. That also means we have to go outside.
Which brings me to my invisible bugs.
I swear, when I come back into the house, I have a new bite on me every time.
Do I ever see them? no.
Do :I ever feel them bite me? no.
Do I swell up from the bite and get to the point where I really shouldn't describe it to you? yes.
Where the heck did that bug come from?
It's invisible.
That's all I can think of.
I have no other explanation.
At this rate, I should be one big swollen bug bite by, uhm, August.
Add to that the sweat that is rolling off of me and together, they make one heck of an attractive package~
Sweat.
I will have to make that my next blog.
When I figure out how to keep the moisture out of my eyes long enough to actually see.
I will leave you now to discuss invisible bugs, as I use the last of my benadryl gel on every pore of my body.

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