Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Not that interesting folks!


Ok, so I have been getting a few complaints that I have not blogged in awhile.
True. I haven't. But I think it's time you all know the truth.
Ready?
Sitting down?
I am NOT that interesting!
Unless I go somewhere to relate my experiences, I am pretty much boring.
Yep, I said it.
I know, it sucks.
Trust me, I would rather be telling you a Vegas story or a funny thing happened on the way to the airport story!
But, I have not gone anywhere since Disneyland and I am just puttering thru the days.
Oh wait, I DID fall in the Safeway parking lot? Does that count?
There I was, leaving Safeway with my grocery cart , in a dress. (Bear with me, I am setting this up)
My receipt flew out of one of the bags and I half heartedly tried to catch it.
In doing so, I contorted in a way that if a carny was in the parking lot, they would have been proud.
The weeble in a dress falllllllls down to her knees. BaBAM!
Instantly, I pop back up. My knees are bleeding, my pride is suffering, and I quickly try to talk myself out of bursting into tears. Hey now, I never claimed to be a Warrior!
Pan with me to the left of the parking lot where a "gangsta" shouts: " DAMN! Yo a'ight?"
Behind me is a Ford pickup driving 2 miles an hour, gawking at the woman who just fell, saying" "did you just see that?" to his partner in the truck.
I felt like I was in a movie and I was playing ALL the roles, reliving them minute by minute.
But, I digress.
So I bounce up IMMEDIATELY and mentally talk myself into being brave, all the way to the car.
I get in the car, call Mitch and tell him to bring a wet washcloth to the driveway when I get home cause I just bit the dust.
I call Breanne and shout " MAMA DOWN! MAMA DOWN!"
I pride myself on not crying like a little girl. Not that I didn't want to, but I was being watched by every damn eye in that parking lot! I had no choice!
All in all, I end up with torn knees, twisted ankle ( felt broken) and wounded pride.
Set the table for a pity party. Colleen's home.
And you wonder why I haven't written anything.......

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