Thursday, May 6, 2010

Where do I start?

Like the title says: where do I start?

With me waking up to lovely flowers and deciding that I was not doing any housework today.
Just a Me day, taking care of female business ( don't go there) like Mani/pedi's,( don't you feel like a perv now?) than off to tan.
Which, allow me to be sidetracked....I do not feel as tho I am getting tan. What's up with that? Does the tanning bed NOT know I am half Guamanian? Chammorro? Whatever? I should be a lovely shade of nut brown by now and yet, here I am in Paleville. Oh, Autumn says my feet are tan. Whoppdeedoo. I feel I should be rewarded with more all over bronze color. Not happy in that department. All I ask is to be browner than Breanne and Michelle. That's all.

Anyway, So I made a trek to Trader Joes where I had to muscle in to get my favorite salad. "Excuse me", "pardon me" I politely say. To which I get a "look". Probably thought "what's this pale woman want?" As I grabbed my salad I made sure to do the ever so slight "backwards glance starting at the toes proceeding up the body to the head that clearly does not mask my disgust" look at the woman who was in my way. Take THAT beyotch.
Then I took it to work and shared it with Breanne. I know, that was nice of me. It's ok to think it.
At some point in time, Autumn suggested I sign up and stay for her Michael Jackson Dance Class.
Hmmmm. " No thanks, I'm already gone" was my reply. Now, if she was busting out the Thriller dance moves, THEN we'd be talkin! THEN we'd be dancin!!

Driving home, I had the fortune or more like, misfortune to observe several geriatric drivers. What is this> Fossil Thursday? Seriously! These people were clearly not comfortable in their cars!! So get off the road! Is it me, or do you see this too? I watched one woman get out of her car, grab her cane ( and I use the word "grab" loosely, that would indicate speed) and try to maneuver out of her car in a parking lot. I was in severe pain watching this. Thank goodness my light turned green lest I have an anxiety attack right then and there. When I pulled away, she still had not managed to get out of her car. The cane was in the parking lot, however. If they are that inept, what makes one believe that they will have cat like skills if an accident should occur?!?!? I'm pretty sure I would have had time to get her out of her car, walk her into the store, make the damn purchase and have her safey tucked back in her car all in under ten minutes. Gonna admit, I am kinda have tempted to get in my car and go see if she is still in that parking lot.......Nah....I'm good.
So now I am home and yeah, I buckled and did a load of laundry. Which got me thinking about the term "housewife". Why am I called that? Am I married to my house? No? Then why aren't I called "husbandwife"? Food for thought people, that's all. I don't think I can ever get thru a day without doing some domestic chore.....however small. Guilt is a powerful motivator.

I will not be an embarassment to Mitchell when he graduates this weekend. I am certain that "the woman with the matching nails and toes" will be noticed.
Why are you laughing? I can see you laughing you know! Hey, overall presentation is important! God forbid someone should see me and blog about me because of a faux pas ! I have to go now, I have to pick out the all important dress for the occasion. A complete package, if you will.
Like anyone cares. But! It is a ME day and that is what it entails.
If you so choose to tell me about your ME day, I promise I will listen.
And not give you the slight backward glance when I walk away.

1 comment:

  1. Whoever did you get flowers from??!! OOOHH!! MY wonderful boyfriend!!

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