Answers...I want them

I, like the rest of the world,. have been immersed in the Boston Bombing. The loss of lives, the videos, the interviews. The horror for those people. The summaries of the lives lost...the photos, the interviews. Such a senseless loss.
Then the process of identifying the bombers blows thu the internet.
When their photos hit the facebook  posts, I knew it was a matter of time. This had to be the most publicized search ever. You just knew someone knew them.
And then late last night, I saw the killing of the MIT policeman and the hijacking of the Mercedes SUV. Something was coming, I thought to myself.

My mind is reeling right now. I have a headache that I don't know if it's self imposed.
I have been watching the news since 6:30 this morning.
I have so many questions.
What happened to these young men who were/are the bombers in the Boston Marathon? And I don't mean in the physical sense. That much is obvious.
The information on who they are.. one a med student and the other a wanna be USA Olympic boxer, such aspirations......what happened? What would make them plant those bombs? Were they paid to?
And then to continue from the bombing to point blank shooting and killing an officer? And then to let the owner of the SUV go at a gas station...why? (Does he realize how lucky he is?)
Did someone "get " to them? Influence them? How they are being described by friends and coaches is not conducive to what they did. It just makes no sense.
So now we have one brother shot and killed and the other on the run.
The police are searching each home, door to door. Can you imagine being held in lockdown and having the police scan thru your home? I can't help but think that the 19 year old that is in hiding must be deciding whether he is going to die or come out alive. His adored brother is dead, he must feel he has nothing to live for. And that scares me for the safety of the Police and Agents  going door to door. So volatile. This WILL play out, and waiting for it is stressful.

And then the mother in me feels for the mother of these boys. What a horror for her to live through. Her husband left for Russia because he is dying of a brain tumor. So she has lost her husband, one son and another son soon. Whatever comes of this,  If he should come out alive, he is lost to her anyway.
The interview with their uncle was so moving to me. You could feel his anger and disgust. And his love for living here. He did a wonderful job, considering his life was turned upside down less than 24 hours before.
It just goes to prove to you that life can flip on you in a minute.
All the speculation on the news and the internet....did the russian mafia wrap themselves around these boys?
My mind just wants answers. To try to make some sense of all this horror.
And it's not done yet.

Will we ever be able to look at another again without wondering what lies within?