Friday, October 10, 2014

Sticks and Stones......

You all remember that rhyme in grade school, right? "Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me!" ? Right?
Totally a fallacy.
Words are hurtful.
Which leads me tell you that I am going to write a book. And call it "Sticks and Stones".
This book will be filled with ALL the mean things my adult children have said to me.
What's that? What do I mean, you say?
Here's an example:  ( I can't give too much away, I want you to buy the book)

"Geez Mom, you're a hot mess today" -B

( on making dinner for guests coming over)
"what can YOU make that's actually GOOD?" -M

"You're pop tarts are the gross kind,,,,way to go" -M

"you're sooooo stupid" -B and M

Oh, just a little taste of my world.
I suppose this is all my own wrongdoing..something went horrible amiss in the raising process of these two children, now adults.
Was I too nice? Was I not nice enough? Was the sarcastic tone in my voice used a little too much?
Did my evil eye scar them for life, thus redeeming them for every opportunity to push me down mentally?
Well, I say , dear children...BRING IT!
Cause I am gonna write a book ALLLLLL about you two!
And it's going to be a best seller because all the other mom's will be able to relate !
And feel sorry for me! Yeah!! That's it!
To which Mitch tells me.......
"Go ahead, Breanne and I will sue you for defamation of character and use the proceeds from the book to put you in a home."
That's going in the book as well.

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