Monday, June 27, 2011

Forgive me Father, for I have judged.


I feel I have always been, how do I say this....non judgemental. After all, I grew up an Army brat. Exposed to nationalities galore all my childhood days. I live in the Pacific Northwest, for crying out loud! Not the midwest!
Today I may have learned I am not. *gasp*
What?!?!
I know! I know! It shocked me as well~
Judgemental call #1.
It all began when I drove to Starbucks ( "pick me up a frappacino, will you babe" <---my Dad)
and I was behind this elderly woman in a monsterous Lincoln. Who, I might explain, was talking to the first reader board that advertised cake pops to go with your delicious coffee. Yeah, she was talking into it. So I gently honked and pantomimed to "go forward to order". She screamed back at me that she was ordering. Sigh.
I get out of my car to tell her that she is indeed NOT ordering and instead, talking to metal and cardboard. "Oh" she said and pulled forward.
No "thank you", no "drop dead", no "middle finger". Just left me standing there.
(Who's the idiot now?)
Yes, I passed judgement. I have a saying. "if you're not comfortable ON the road, get OFF". And I was soooo wishing I had printed those bumper stickers out by the hundreds so I could have handed her one.
Judgemental call #2. On the way to Paldo World, is a Mexican Mercado where I have found the hot sauce Danny Likes. So I stop in. Go right to the aisle where I found it last to see there is none there. So I go to ask the cashier if they have more in the back. A blank stare is what I got.
( maybe she doesn't speak english?)
So, here I go. "donde es la salsa muy caliente Sriracha?"
Again, the look.
Then she comes out from behind the counter and goes to where I just stood.
"hmmm, we don't have any". Really? Really???

Judgemental call #3.
So onward I go to get that needed item at Paldo World. What is Paldo World you ask? It is wonderful store on South Tacoma way that carries every asian/mexican/vietnamese, etc, etc food item known to man. I was on the hunt for some extra hot Sriracha sauce for Danny. When I was at my Dad's earler, ( after judgement #1 incident) I was telling Michael on my phone that I was going to Paldo World next . Chung, my dad's caretaker, overheard this and started giggling.
I hung up and asked her why the snickering? She said " YOU'RE going to Paldo World?!? Attention, we have a white woman in aisle 7, attention, white woman in aisle 7" then burst into more hysterical laughter. Oh . My. Gosh.
Is this what those employees really think? I assume so. So I am walking down the aisles, ( not aisle 7, we all know what happens THEN) looking at all the hot sauces.
A couple of Korean woman walk by me and look at me like I am drinking toilet water.
No lie.
And no, I wasn't.
Then comes the hushed tones of muttering under their breath so only they can hear each other. I just get the muted words. Not that it mattered, they were speaking Korean and I CANT UNDERSTAND YOU ANYWAY, hellllllo!
So I do my best to round up what I came for with confidence and throw in a couple of items I didn't come for ,so as to look like I BELONG.
Sorry Danny, no extra hot Sriracha hot found there either. And I wasn't about to ask.
No sireeee.
Judgemental #4.
On the way home from said Paldo World, I was sitting at a red light. When a woman crosses the street in front of me. Wearing a pair of beige sweat pants that were so tight, I swear a couple of raccoons' were struggling to get out. Now,.... what on earth possessed this woman to leave the house this morning wearing THAT? Does she have no friends?
" does this look ok?"-"oooouuu yeah girl, that makes you look HOT".
No friends.
I wanted to jump out of the car, give her a couple of quick tips and leave the scene. Kinda like Superwoman, only for fashion, instead of crime. "who was that masked woman who set me on the right path?"....
Come on people, I am no twiggy but I know how to turn my head and look in the mirror to see how I look walking away from you all! And granted, back fat is not easy to suck in, but it can be done with the right clothing!
Seriously?
Ok, I am done being judgemental for the day.
Or at least, I hope I am.
Proceed with what you were doing......




Monday, June 20, 2011

Time to Re-Direct Myself~


When I was in the grocery store today, I found myself gravitating towards the magazines.
Oooh look, a new Bridal magazine!
Oh, wait, the wedding is over! I don't need a new Bridal magazine for ideas anymore.
But I miss it! There's something about searching, hunting and foraging for new ideas that I love~go figure.
So I stared at the travel magazines until I decided they didn't hold my interest. Is that a new color scheme for summer weddings I see over there?
Stop it! No! No more Bridal magazines Colleen!
My brain obviously doesn't understand. The need for color, shape, design and layout is a force stronger than myself.
I only see a remedy via a lottery ticket. Then I can go back and buy that travel magazine.

Yes, the wedding is over. And it was fan-tab-u-lous.
Not a glitch, not a melt down, not a tense moment to be found anywhere. I did however, find people asking me how I felt.?
Did I look tense? Cause I was sooo not tense. It was going so smooth and easy, there was no way I COULD be tense.
Altho, THAT made me a tad bit tense. "how you doing Mom?" directed at me several times a day was , well, puzzling.
My team of fantastic helpers drop kicked the decorating in an hour and a half!
Michael: " so, why did you need us to be here so early anyway?"....
Uhm, "cause I had no idea things would run so dang smooth, hello!!"
I was so comfy I could have spent the night there! Let's face it, the cozy chairs, the left over cakes that Cortney baked, the bar not closed yet. Yeah, sleep over time.
I did find it amusing that I saw quite a few take home containers of cake going home with guests! See Cort, you are the bomb!!!
I actually still have people talking about the cakes~ which in turn, makes me want one.
Ever had a cake so soft and filled with flavor that you wanted to be alone? Well, these made THAT dream pale in comparison! Not kidding. Not even a little.
The bride and groom were stunning, the photographer amazing and the guests had so much fun!
What more could I ask for?

What's that you say? You're planning a wedding?
I know just the website you need to look at.
And the magazines.
Give me a call.